Authors note: Emotions i felt quite some time ago. Time has passed and i have indeed moved on..but the power of such sudden emotions are still clear to me..
Why did you have me believe he'd be ok!
Why did you make me think he'd come home the next day.
Why did'nt i say Goodbye the last day of his life!
I told you to take his suffering away, but i did'nt mean for you to take him away. I did'nt know you would. I did'nt think you would.
I wanted to hear his voice again. You did'nt even give me the chance to hear him speak again. I wanted to make him laugh and smile, and even fight again.
I'm so mad at you..
I'm so terribly angry at what you've done.
WHY God! WHY!
I can't think straight, or even pray. Cuz each time i try, I end up fighting with you all over again.
I don't think its fair..though you're will says it is.
I think thats what makes me angrier.
...
I still needed him. WE Still needed him.
You made mom cry, and my sisters too.
She says she's just healing, but it feels like stabs to an open wound.
I'm so angry..
I'm so angry.
I'm so angry at you.
I'm writing this down because i find no other way to tell you without scaring half the neighborhood. I want to scream and yell and throw things around. I'd break down the house, the hood, the world if i could. I can't though. i just can't.. I know he would'nt want that. But its how i feel. How i think i could get the message through to everyone, that im NOT ok. not now anyways..maybe not for a long time.
I'm SO BLOODY Angry!
I could Yell it out Forever , but i bite my tounge instead.
I need you to know, it does'nt mean i don't love you, but im so mad.
Full of scorn, and resentment.
I can't hate you cuz i love you, but it makes it even worse. It makes me madder all the same.
My eyes burn from all those tears.
I have no voice from all that screaming.
I've had enough!
Just know this..
I'm angry at you
So angry..
And im tired od asking 'Why'
I want him back!
But you won't bring him back from his new home. I know you would'nt do that to him either.
I know you won't...
I'm angry.
I'm crying..
And i miss him so much..
I'm angry..I'm Angry
...I'm so angry it hurts..
Please....please make it stop...
Why did you have me believe he'd be ok!
Why did you make me think he'd come home the next day.
Why did'nt i say Goodbye the last day of his life!
I told you to take his suffering away, but i did'nt mean for you to take him away. I did'nt know you would. I did'nt think you would.
I wanted to hear his voice again. You did'nt even give me the chance to hear him speak again. I wanted to make him laugh and smile, and even fight again.
I'm so mad at you..
I'm so terribly angry at what you've done.
WHY God! WHY!
I can't think straight, or even pray. Cuz each time i try, I end up fighting with you all over again.
I don't think its fair..though you're will says it is.
I think thats what makes me angrier.
...
I still needed him. WE Still needed him.
You made mom cry, and my sisters too.
She says she's just healing, but it feels like stabs to an open wound.
I'm so angry..
I'm so angry.
I'm so angry at you.
I'm writing this down because i find no other way to tell you without scaring half the neighborhood. I want to scream and yell and throw things around. I'd break down the house, the hood, the world if i could. I can't though. i just can't.. I know he would'nt want that. But its how i feel. How i think i could get the message through to everyone, that im NOT ok. not now anyways..maybe not for a long time.
I'm SO BLOODY Angry!
I could Yell it out Forever , but i bite my tounge instead.
I need you to know, it does'nt mean i don't love you, but im so mad.
Full of scorn, and resentment.
I can't hate you cuz i love you, but it makes it even worse. It makes me madder all the same.
My eyes burn from all those tears.
I have no voice from all that screaming.
I've had enough!
Just know this..
I'm angry at you
So angry..
And im tired od asking 'Why'
I want him back!
But you won't bring him back from his new home. I know you would'nt do that to him either.
I know you won't...
I'm angry.
I'm crying..
And i miss him so much..
I'm angry..I'm Angry
...I'm so angry it hurts..
Please....please make it stop...
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